Pictures from the hospital!

This is a picture of where the doctor signed my head.



This is me finally able to eat. I was asking for Sonic right after I woke up. They would only let me eat liquids right after the surgery. So I had 7 up and ice chips then I order Popsicles, broth and an Italian ice this was all in the first hour after surgery. I was able to keep that down and then able to order real food.




This is a picture of mom and dad with me right after surgery. I didn't open my eyes for the first little bit I was afraid I would be sick.



This is a picture of my mom and my mother in law waiting during surgery.



This is a picture just after we got there. This is the nurse that prepared me to go up stairs for surgery. She couldn't get an IV started. They say it is harder after chemo. It was hard for nurses even before chemo. The last couple of times they get it in the blood starts to flow and then just stops. So when I went up stairs the anasteseologist( I am not a good spell and no suggestion come up for this) started an IV in my jugular. They told Ryan that he needed to leave that he shouldn't watch so I didn't see him after he left before I went in for surgery. Doctor Fewel came in while she was working on the IV in my neck and he left right away. She had to stitch the tube down to my neck. That was a different experience not painful just very different.

Getting ready for rAdiATioN

Today I had my appointment to get me all set up for radiation. They took Ryan and I back to a patient room and gave me a consent form to sign asked if I had an questions. Then the nurse brought us back out to the waiting room to wait for one of the techs I think that is what they are called.

I guy came and got me and told Ryan he had to wait. So he took me back and put me on a CT scan bed and put my head in a pillow. They then took this piece of plastic that looked like those pieces of plastic that you loop yarn through when you were a kid to make a picture. Anyway he dipped it in hot water and then put it on my face to make a mold and lock it down to the table so my head wouldn't move. He then took some CT pictures of my brain and I was done.

He asked what time of day works good for my appointments and I was out the door. It was very fast and painless. It was also so different from any other experience with doctors offices then I have had. They are very nice but not a personal experience very cut and dry.

We will be on vacation next week so they agreed to start radiation the Monday after vacation. That means I will be done the Friday of Labor Day weekend.

What did Dr. Kris have to say about Radiation?

I think on the last post I put that I had an appointment with Dr. Fewel on Thursday it was last Tuesday sorry. I had an appointment with Dr. Kris on Thursday. I was a little nervous. I canceled my radiation appointment on Thursday so I could keep my appointment with Dr. Kris. We wanted to know what he thought about the radiation. We had fasted and prayed about the radiation and we both feel it is the right thing to do. So I was nervous Dr. Kris would say no I don't think you should do radiation. He didn't say that.

Dr. Kris said he thought radiation was a good move. He just had some suggestion on some more vitamins to take with the radiation to help it to work better and to help my cells not get so damaged.

I told him that the radiation Dr. told me I couldn't take some of the meds. Dr. Kris told me he had done some research once I told him I was going to do radiation and that all the meds are safe. So I will be taking them anyway.

Of course my back was a little out so I had an adjustment.

I also talked to him about the thrush and he suggested I get the nystantin(sp) the swish and spit med for my throat.

StAples aRE gONe!

I had an appointment with Dr. Fewel last Thursday it went well. He took out the staples. I had a few people saw or ask if it was going to hurt. It didn't I thought it might. But my head on the side were they cut I can't feel anything. So I knew I wouldn't feel those staples but on my neck I thought it might hurt but it didn't.

He talked to me about the fact that he would like me to have a scan again soon if neither Doctor runs one. So he wants me back in after I am done with radiation. We talked about radiation a little bit and some of the side affects. It was a short visit.

He said everything went well. I fortgot to ask him if I could drive again. He didn't mention it so I guess it wasn't that big of a deal if I drove before the two weeks since I wasn't on the pain meds. I also forgot to ask for the pictures and the piece of the tumor that he got from the surgery. I guess I will see him again in a few weeks. I hope I can remember.

RaDiatioN TrEAtmenT

So Friday I had an appointment with the Radiation Doctor. I forget his name. I really liked him. He was the most personable doctor I have had yet. He also was very throe and very informative. He did a full body exam. He went over all the possible side affects. He then went over what would happen. So if I choose to do radiation the possible side affects are fatigue, nausea (which they will prescribe meds for), skin burn(which I can use Aloe lotions), stuffy head(which they can prescribe something may also have to have tubes), hair lose after the first week of treatment(peach fuzz after treatment, then no hair for 6 months, then possible no hair grow except for Mohawk hair growth) I think those are the only immediate side affects. I asked long term and I didn't really get an answer. The only one that bothers me is the possible permanent hair loss. Knowing that eventually my hair will come back is comforting and makes it not hard for me to lose it. I am not so sure about the possibility of it never coming back for coming in thin that is a little harder to swallow.

We found out that you don't grow new brain cells you receive all your brain cells by the time you are two. Which in this case is good. The radiation only attacks the cells that split and grow. Which is the cancer and hair, skin things like that. So no brain damage just killing hair follicles, skin cells and the cancer.

We also found out that treatment will be 15 visits or three weeks. Which I think is great news. I was thinking 6 weeks. All the breast cancer patients I know are doing or have done six weeks. He said brain cancer is different. Even though it was breast cancer in the brain still brain so different. The appointments are about 20 minutes and a little longer on Mondays I have to see the doctor on Mondays before appointments.

I also had someone ask what is radiation. For me basically it is laser lights that are pointed at the area of treatment.

Also having radiation decreases my risk of the cancer returning by 50%. So I would go from %60 that it will return to my brain to %10 if treated with radiation.

I have heard not good things about radiation and was a little unsure if it was the right thing for me. So Ryan and I fasted yesterday to make sure that radiation is a good treatment for me. We feel that it will be o.k. to do the radiation. So I am scheduled for another radiation appointment to be measured and marked up or tattooed on Thursday. So I will let you know how that goes. I then should start treatment that following Monday or Tuesday. It depends on if they can get everything ready and set up how quick I will go in.

I still have the thrush it doesn't feel as bad and I am still taking the meds. It is a pill I will take for 10 days.

I also have an appointment with Dr. Fewle tomorrow so I will try to be better and post about that tomorrow.

I am feeling so good. I feel like I have most of my energy back if not all of it. I think the kids do a great job of keeping me busy and preoccupied which I think really helps.

nOthiG tAste riGhT

I went to the Hospital yesterday to receive my Herceptin treatment. I have decided that I need to be better about telling them symptoms I have and letting them decided which ones are important and which ones aren't. Instead of saying nothing and think in time they will pass. I was telling the nurse that my taste has changed but that the last few days more like certin things burn my tongue. So when I eat nothing tastes right. So you would think since nothing taste right that I wouldn't be eating anything but that is not the case I can't seem to put enough food in my mouth trying to figure out why nothing taste right. So I thought now they know about my taste then I told them my voice is horse again. This is the 4th time since chemo. I had told Dr. Rado and he said we will just watch it and see. The nurse said oh maybe they touch that part of your brain and the taste will come back. Then she asked to look in my mouth and asked if I had sores. I was like I don't know never thought to look in there and see if something was wrong. She said you have sores in your mouth. The other nurse came in and said I think you have thrush in your throat and mouth. Probably for a while. So know that I have made this a long story I have thrush. So they gave me a prescription yesterday and hopefully in the next few days things will start to taste good again.

Our adventure on the BUS

Well again I relized it has been awhile since I have posted. With this surgery they wont let me drive until I see the doctor again next Tuesday. I thought that was going to be a really big challenge but it has been an adventure. The kids and I have been enjoying the bus system. We rode the bus to have some blood work done for an appointment I had with Dr. Rado and then we rode it again on Wednesday to the free movies. The kids like it is such a great adventure and I have found the bus works well to get around.

We are a baseball, softball loving family and Cole has been done for a while. Ryan or I usually like to play but things have been a little crazy this year. Ryan got asked to play this week so the kids and I really excited to head over to the ball fields on Tuesday. While we were there Carter was stung by a wasp and so was Bradly a friend. Anyway he cried and cried I felt so bad I have never had a child stung before.

Head Pictures

So my sister Bailey is here and we took some pictures with her new camera of my growing hair. She couldn't believe how long it has gotten sinice she has been here. To me it doesn't seem to be growing very fast. Anyway she said I haven't taken a good picture of it so here that it.



I hope this doesn't gross anyone out. I think it is kinda cool I guess that is having boys right. Anyway a picture of the staples.

July 10th update

I just wanted to do a quick update. I came home yesterday. No news today. That is my good news. I slept pretty good. I am not having any pain so I haven't had any pain medicine since Tuesday night. They sent me home with some but I haven't needed any. They also sent me home with steroids to tapper off of. I really don't like them and have been looking forward to being off them. I still have a few more doses but should be done with those by Saturday. The only symptom is a tight neck. With all the stitching and staples it is tight. So I hold my head more still and funny. Mom says I probably need to work on moving it more. Which until today I hadn't even thought about. I was worried when I move my neck it would hurt but it hasn't just tights. So adjusting to that movability. I get a little winded when I get up and move around alot. So hopefully the energy will come back quickly. I am thinking the hardest thing is the no driving for two weeks. I think they do that because of the pain medicine and aren't sure about balance. I have been fine in the balance no problems there. So I see Dr. Fewle on the 22nd and the way it looks like I should be cleared from everything from him. I am no doctor but I feel great.

I just wanted to let you know that I am truly blessed by my Father in Heaven. There are and were so many miracles and blessings that have come from this. I am thankful for the opportunity to learn, and I hope to grow. Also to be able to see so many kind and helpful people. Thank you for your kind words, thoughts, prayers and help. Our family is very grateful for all who have helped and are helping us. We can never repay all the kindness so thank you.

July 9th update!

I thought i would update a little. There isn't much new going on. They moved me from ICU to I think the 4th floor which is the surgery floor around 11:30 am yesterday. Once I got here I have had lots of nice fun visitors thanks so much. I have had no really pain like the first night. I have been able to be up and around. Ryan and I even went for a walk around the hospital last night. The nurse didn't check on me much so I got some better sleep last night. I was even able to lay more in the bed last night.

Doctor came in this morning and said when ever i was ready to go home I could. So we will see how quick things get pushed through. I wasn't wanting to go home right away but I am ready to be in my own house. I wasn't sure I would be but I am ready.

So I am doing really well.

I can't remember if Ryan posted but I will see Dr.Fewle in 2 weeks we will get more update then. For now no driving and lifting otherwise what ever I am up for I can do. No washing my hair until thursday and he said it will take a few weeks to get all the yellow junk cleaned up. I can't start radiation until I see him Dr. Fewle and as of right now I don't have a Dr. appointment for the radiation but that will be coming with time. Right now I am going to try and rest to recovery faster back to things.

Thanks so much for the comments, visitors and of course the meals. It helps to not have to worry about that so thank you so much.

So I thought I would do I little update on my evening. I started to have more pain as the night went on so we tried to get that under control last night. I had dinner felt great and then they gave me some morphine for the pain to get it under control. We started out with 1 ml. I guess that is quite low. I felt a little sick but still having pain so the nurse gave me 1 more ml diluted and with in seconds throw up. I guess I have an allergy to morphine. So no morphine for this girl. We tried two different other pain medication. We found a winner it worked so much better it is the Lora tab. I was able to have a bowl of ice cream. The pain was a little more bearable and was able to get a little sleep. I got up this morning and at 5:30 had the CT scan and got that over with. Now I am having some breakfast and will wait for the doctor.

Surgury Update

We haven't been able to access the Internet. The wireless hasn't been working. So for an update the surgery was successful and no complications. Rochelle is a trooper. When the doctor came out to the waiting room, he told us she did just fine and she was already talking. "not Rochelle" He said that he thinks the tumor is breast cancer and it all came out just fine. He suggests she should do radiation eventually. After a couple of hours in ICU the doctor came in to see how she was doing. He said she is doing so good he thinks she will be able to go home tomorrow. He wants her to have a CT scan tomorrow to make sure everything is OK and there is no bleeding. If that comes back good he thinks he will release her, but she is putting up a fight. She wants to stay for a couple more days so she can have a little mini vacation.

Right off the bat she asked for 7-up and ice. At 3:00 she had some chicken broth and about 6:00pm she was able to eat a meatball sandwich. She is doing good not feeling sick. After surgery the doctor also said she was probably going to feel nausea and might have to throw up. But she has been able to keep everything down.

She is my super hero.

Thank you for all your thoughts and prayers. We appreciate it.

Update before the hospital!

So I have been up early enough and had enough time in the mornings to post but Ryan doesn't like listening to the typing at 4:30am. Once things get going in the morning it seems that the last few days have been filled with lots of family and fun. So I thought I would take a few minutes and update.

I had a few different phone calls and questions today that I thought I had written about here on the blog. I am not sure if I haven't or I am just not a good communicator. I ready know I am not a good communicator so I am guess it is more that.

Anyway to let you know yes I am having surgery tomorrow at 7:30 am at Kadlec Hospital with Dr. Fewle. I will be there by 5:45 the surgery can last 1 1/2 to how every long. He said figure on about 3 hours. So Ryan shouldn't know much before 10:30 I am guessing. We are taking a laptop to update new news. We probably wont call everyone not even all family. I could be wrong but Ryan is not much for talking on the phone. So we will try to keep the blog updated. We should know right away if it is the breast cancer. If not it will be a few days before they will know. They will also do a CT scan right away to make sure they got everything. Anyway we should hopefully be updating often on the blog or at least once a day.

I also wanted to say a thank you to all the prayers they mean alot to me. I wish I was more witty and good with words to let you know thanks and how I am doing. But if you know me I am a straight shooter. So to let you know I am doing well not nervous and am very sure things are going to go really well.

Also an update on the toe. Ryan was looking at the blog today and is like your toe doesn't even look bad on the blog. It is much uglier and black in person. It is fine and not a big deal. It does look bad and only hurts when the kids step on it.

O.k. I do want to post a few family pictures and let you know we had such a great weekend with family and friends. I know I already said it but I love holidays or any good reason to spend time with family and friends.



We decided on a pancake breakfast at IHOP and saw a few other friends decided the same thing.



So here we are again out front of IHOP. Can you tell my hair is growing in? The doctor said they aren't going to shave my head just the spot where they cut so I shouldn't have to start over.



We than headed out to Basin City for there parade. The kids love this parade all the candy. Cole rode on a float in the the parade.



This is Cole after the parade. Cole soaked his dad from the float so his dad then after the parade dunked Cole in the water bucket. Cole was not happy I am sure you can tell.



This is Kamden riding a bike with no training wheels for the first time.



This was the next item on the list for Friday. We got a new water slide for summer but the kids just don't enjoy it was much as they have the pool. So we put up a pool. This was Ryan and the boys project while we had a family BBQ. This is everyone pitching in.



Here is Ryan working on his project for the day.



We all had a good time. The pool was put up and kids enjoyed the slide and the adults enjoyed lots of food and homemade ice cream along with cards.



Here is a picture of my sister Jillian. The baby!




Here is my sister Kendall number 4 and Kim number 2.





We spent all Saturday from sun up to sun down with family and friends doing what we love the most lately boating!



We had a great last day of vacation. Sunday is a favorite day at our house more family time. I was up early and even made waffles. I haven't done that since moving to the new 9am time change. To early for me to get up and do waffles and get the kids ready for church. Of course on steriods I have more up time and more energy. So the kids were so excited I like to make waffles on Saturdays and Sundays when we are home. Anyway we went to church and then home for Family Home Evening. We had a lesson on the 4th of July and why we celbrate the fourth. We then made our own flags and we had our own wars. We enjoyed building towers, thumb wars and a gunny sack race. We then ended the day with another BBQ at my parents. We have most Sunday dinners with my family on Sunday's. They were all nice to me and played cards. Ryan and I love to play cards. Most of my family doesn't enjoy it as much.

Funny toe

O.k. lets see if I can finish one thought well posting today.

So to start I am feeling good today for those that are wondering. I have been busy getting thing put together for the weekend and the next coming weeks. I was able to get the grocery shopping done and the lawn mowed yesterday. And today I was able to get the house cleaned. So it doesn't need to be done for a while. I have to say for those that know me I am getting better about the cleaning. I am not cleaning all the time. Just picking up and doing a little hear and there. Anyway enough of that.

I didn't get to sleep last night until 2:30 or 3am then Ryan was up at 4:30 so I was up soon after to clean. I usually lay in bed and try to go back to sleep but I figured I wasn't sleeping and Ryan was gone so why not get up. I would like to say I think I am anxious but I don't feel anxious or nervous. Just like I can't get ready enough for the weeks to come and my mind doesn't stop running.

So that is probably why there are no compete thoughts on the blog I am running on not much sleep and seems to be bouncing around. Sorry.

O.k. and I had a funny....sad.... crying.... moment last night. It was 8 or 9 last night and I was hungry and went down stairs to get some food. Well on my way down the stairs I fell. I am not sure what happened but I fell. I skinned my elbow and rolled my toe. I think I landed on it on my toe while it was backwards. Anyway I took some pictures. I am not sure you can even tell. Anyway it really hurt and I decided it couldn't have been a better time. I had some Hydrocodone(o.k. I know you already know but I am not a speller) handy and took one and the pain went away but this morning it was sore and very pretty. So it was a moment of what an idiot and really!

Nothing new today

O.k. so nothing really new don't get to excited about this update. Just wanted to let everyone know I am feel well today the steroids seem to work good as long as I stay on a schedule. As it gets close to time to take them I feel a little pressure but nothing like last Friday. I am also looking forward to the 4th and all the excitement. I love holidays and time to spend with my family. I know we already do most everything together but it is still a great excuse.

I don't know if I already told this story but I wanted to add it in. So bear with me. We were coming home the other day and we could see the Richland golf course. Cole says to me, "Why are all the guys out golfing where are there families"? We then talked about how for our family it is a family thing that we like to do as a family but that most people don't see it that way. He was a little confused because we pretty much only do it as a family. I love that he thinks we should always be doing things together. I am sure it will change but for now I am thankful he loves to do things with us all.

I also wanted to say at this time I really don't need anything but I well let you know after the surgery. I will probably need help after the surgery with meals. If you are looking to help you can call Nicole and let her know you can bring in a meal after the surgery. I think we might starve if I had to leave the cooking up to Ryan. O.k. we wouldn't strave we would just be eating macaroni every night. I am sure the kids wouldn't mind that. The funny thing is I know he can cook he did before we were married. But he now claims he can't and hasn't. I can't complain he is so good at so many other things if he doensn't want to cook that is o.k. in my book.

Dr. Fewel

I am so tired. I think it is from the relief of finally knowing what is going to happen. I have to say I got so much information today. I will do my best to let you know what the Dr said.

I had a Dr. appointment with Dr. Fewel. We were there at 8:45 but we didn't get in to see him until 9:45 maybe 10am. That is so normal for all or most of our Dr.'s appointments. I am getting use to Dr. time. They never run on time and everything is an emergency. So basically nothing is an emergency I guess. I actually don't mind waiting this way Ryan and I get to visit and talk about the magazines we are looking through. I was starting to miss visiting with him with no more chemo and the fact that it is summer and he is busier.

When Dr. came in he asked about my symptoms and what I have had done and did a little physical exam. Then we headed to his office to look at the MRI pictures. I have to say we talked alot about the pictures. It is really hard to go over all that information with out the photo or images. But I will give you the jest of what we talked about.

The surgery will be in Monday morning. Which I was not very excited about I wanted done now. Then the more I thought about it I know it was the best. This way I can get my house cleaned, groceries bought and spend the 4th with my family. So I am relieved that I can focus on those things for now.

There could be somethings to worry about but as we talked about them he really didn't think there is anything to worry about. Nothing is for sure but he gave me best case and kind of worse case.

So best case I will be in surgery for hour 1/2 to 3 hours but it could be longer. It just depends on what they find. Which we went over all that. Then he said I would be in the hospital 2 or 3 days best case which is what he is counting on. Then if I get sick or something happens in surgery it could be long. I told Ryan that isn't a long enough vacation 2 days. I might have to see if they will let me stay longer. j/k Then I will be no lifting and no driving for at least 2 weeks. Then at his 2 week appointment he will let me know better when I can start to do things.

Were this tumor is it affects my balance and mobility. I think that is better than on the top which would affect memory and other more major things.

He said this is not normal for breast cancer and not normal for just a tumor. He said it doesn't really fit anything that he can pin down. So once they take it out and biopsy it he will know better what we are looking at.

He recommended radiation after the surgery if it is the breast cancer. We will see I am not sure. There are positives and negatives. I am still thinking about that one. Radiation has long term effects when you are talking brain but the risk of the cancer not returning is better if I do the radiation.

Like I said we went over some concerns and some positives that are hard to go into with out pictures. So for know I think that is all I can remember.

We spent the next hour or two at the hospital getting registered and doing blood draws and going over what will be going on in the hospital. I think that is so funny. I am re registered every month but when I go for any MRI, CT or anything else they re register me, refill out paper work. Does that make any sense.

I know I say it all the time but I really feel like I need to say it more often. Thank you for all the well wishes and comments. It is nice to turn on the computer and hear from so many friends old and new. Thank you for your thoughts and the time you take to post. And I know that there are a few of you out there that don't post but read thank you too.

Wide Awake!

Well I have been up since 5am. Usually I lay in bed and try to go back to sleep and some times do for a little while longer. All I could think about is all the emails I needed to get out. So I have been up since 5am emailing and reading blogs. I know what a great waste of time. But when you can't sleep what better things do I have to do. Oh, I guess I could have been reading or doing something I am sure way more productive. Anyway I think I am a little anxious about what is going to happen this morning. I am sure that is why I am wide awake. While tired but wide awake. Is that possible? I wont be surprised if I come home with just more question and no answers and more of a waiting game. It seems to be that way. You find something out or have something done and then you have to wait. I think that is the hardest part. I think this time it is the hardest part. I want to get moving and get this brain tumor out. So we can go back to all of our fun family summer activities. Sorry for rambling can you tell I am tired. I need to go and start getting the kids ready to go this morning. I am hoping for not such hot weather today. Hot but not overly hot like the yesterday.

O.k. so Cole is up and guess what he just reminded me. Can you ask the doctor to take lots of pictures of your brain. He said that to me last week and I forgot. So this morning he is reminded me to ask the Dr. to take lots of pictures of my brain. I love kids they help you stay happy and normal what ever normal is right.

Oh, I wanted to do a shout out last Friday and just haven't gotten to it. I wanted to do a shout out to Heidi Wilson!!! Can you believe she is done with her 8 rounds or chemo. Wait to go girl you made it. I hope the side effects this last time weren't to bad. Just raidation left we hope. I am hoping for not so many side effects for you.